Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Back in the saddle again, after a brief indulgence

I fell off the wagon just a little bit today. I feel guilty about it, so I might as well confess and get it off my chest. Most of this day has been really hectic. I had a nice few hour break from the hecticity (hecticness? hmm) when Marelize and Melanie came over for our playgroup. But this morning I felt like I had a trillion things to do and not enough time to do them in. I slept in a little (I stuck Eva in front of Barney to get an extra 30 minutes) and had a massive headache that wouldn't go away even with medicine. I didn't have enough time to run and get sweaty and shower before running to the grocery store, so I decided to just cheat a little and do a pilates workout. I didn't have time to eat anything, and that wasn't helping my headache. I was getting the kids' shoes and coats on and had Leighton strapped in his seat ready to walk out the door when I realized I had forgotten to get dressed. I almost hopped in the car in my underwear. Cute.

It was POURING rain, so hauling everyone and everything into Walmart was no easy feat. And can I just say that I hate wet shopping carts? I don't mind the rain for myself and it doesn't bother me emotionally that it's so gloomy all the time here, but it is extremely inconvenient to drag babies in and out of that kind of weather. Anyway. I got everything I needed and ran home to make lunch. Then I had a nice break while my favorite friends came over to hang out. I finally got to eat, which was nice. I know skipping meals is NOT part of losing weight, but I just didn't have a spare minute to cook some eggs before lunchtime. Lunch was Mexican chicken soup, which is a SB recipe.

Then came the evening. I had to make a "healthy" treat for my first YW activity. I decided on these cookies from Pioneer Woman. I have been wanting to make them for a long time, and I figured tonight was a good time since they have granola and dried fruit in them. That qualifies as healthy, right? In spite of all the butter and sugar? So I made them. And I tasted a little bit of the dough. Just to make sure it tasted good. And it was the BEST cookie dough I've ever tasted. Maybe it's just because I'm on a diet, but it was amazing. I tasted a little more. Yum. I baked the cookies and decided I should taste one. Just to make sure. It was HEAVENLY. I felt guilty that it was dinner time and I hadn't eaten anything but a cookie and cookie dough. And neither had Eva. (Today was not a stellar mothering day...) So I made some broccoli and ate it. And then...I HAD ANOTHER COOKIE. Hello? Can we say weakling? I couldn't help it. Those cookies are hands-down the best cookie I have ever made. Possibly even the best I've ever tasted. Please don't judge me. I will be good tomorrow, I promise. I don't have anywhere I have to be, so it will be easier to take time to prepare healthy food for myself.

Today it's the end of day 7. I haven't lost any more weight yet (I wonder why, sugar-addict?) but tomorrow I'll hop to it. I'll do my usual workout and eat healthy. And I'll try to silence those voices in my head that are screaming at me to stop this stupid diet, take the 5 pounds, and run. I'll really try. Unless I get a whiff of those cookies again...

4 comments:

Elisa said...

You are so funny. I laughed out loud reding this post a few times, and Jeremy looked at me funny, so I had to explain why I was laughing. I Loved that you almost walked out your door in your underwear! And that you call youself a sugar addict. The best part about it, is that we all feel that way, but you actually voiced it! The rest of us are closet sugar addicts! Thanks for the good read, and I look forward to more!

Melanie said...

You crack me up Stephanie. You look great and you have so much will power to even be doing this in the first place. I admire your stamina! I am WAY too much of a weakling and would have given up on hour 2 of my diet. Anyhoo, dont fret about 2 stupid little cookies. You definately burn that off in just an hour of chasing around after your little ones. So relax, and enjoy the memory of what they tasted like. Cant wait to see ya'll tomorrow. Hopefully I will be better company than I was yesterday. I was an embarrassment to myself! ;o)

Annie said...

Ugh, lugging babies in the rain DOES sound like a pain. Although I'm glad you don't mind the "gloominess." I LOVE it!

Oh, and don't beat yourself up too much. I think a 100% elimination of cookies and sweet is terrible because it makes you just want to binge all the time! I am really impressed that you only ate 3. I think I have eaten about 15 cookies in the last 48 hours, since I made some cookie dough 2 days ago. Ugh, I really miss being able to eat the dough...

bones chick said...

YOu are doing great. I think we shouldn't deprive ourselves, but moderation. When I starve myself from cravings I eat till I'm sick so you are doing great and shouldn't look at it any other way.